AboutFLR.com has been collecting data in several ways since December 2010. We collected survey data, self assessments, MAG and Reputation Point data, participation data, interviews and anecdotal data submitted by users of this website. This is without doubt the largest collection of evidence about female led relationships to draw some early conclusions from. Victor Ell took the initiative to graph the relationship between formal FLR, the 5 food groups, relationship dynamics and the kink that is pervasive in pop culture about FLR - his work allowed us all to see just how different play is from relationship and FLR is from 50/50 relationships. There are surprises, some big duhs and a shock or two, but first a brief history of about how aboutFLR.com got started with its current ideas.
The original authors of aboutFLR.com have been on a lifelong quest to understand the drive men have toward FLR and the resistance women seem to have. The website was the second experimental forum giving voice to and gather evidence about "unequal relationships". Unequal relationship is a thesis by author M. Lyman Hill (who also wrote extensively about the 5 food groups) about how relationship dynamics actually worked. The men and women who penned the bulk of this website's original test launched another experiment 3 years earlier about the dynamic of mates wanting to submit, be subject or completely surrender (consensual slavery) to another. Like this one it became popular quickly being used by 8-10,000 people a month and like aboutFLR.com it had surveys and self-assessments.
The history of the reasoning of the writers of this website came over the span of 20-30 years of talking it over and experimenting with FLR and MLR ideas. All of the authors have a love hate relationship with FLR, MLR and all relationship types because they seemed to have so many flaws. In the late 1990s M. Lyman Hill began to write about what he then called the pre-food groups. In 2005 he formalized his thesis of the 5 Food Groups and together with the other authors of this website voiced the ideas behind unequal relationships, how they greatly simplify life and make things better because those in power can make life better for all. When aboutFLR.com was designed the authors had several things they wanted to prove or disprove.
We know from self assessments and surveys 'conclusively' that women are about 30% less kinky than men and less than 30% would ever embrace FLR as it approaches the male fantasy of FemDom. Women flee the idea of any relationship with a man that nears FemDom because they don't want that as their self-image or don't want a slavish guys as their social image of men. Men about 90% of the time discussed something to do with their fantasy such as chastity, punishment, control or some element of sex; while women only discussed it 10% of the time and most often did not use any graphic imagery.
More than half of the women who are interested in FLR are married and say they are in a phase of experimentation. The experimentation come from a nervousness with leadership in the 5 food groups where they want male participation and help with decision making. Often women have an issue of confidence though women don`t seem to be forming any communities to support each other in their growth.
Despite the name 'female led relationship', 'wife led relationship' or 'girlfriend led relationship'; it is in fact men who are leading FLR as we know it today. We believe men want FLR "for real" but they can't seem to let go and women don`t seem to be picking up the mantel.
There are 11 times more men discussing FLR than women, of those, most are discussing the non relationship oriented elements of FLR. About 4% of men make an effort to move towards what women say they want in FLR. Less that 1% of men thinking about FLR participate in any retraining or re-socialization effort. Our MAG course estimate of men who have a good chance at success with FLR was 25% of men who are willing to retrain and rethink FLR after the fashion their women want. Ouch for men! Men have very little credibility. 4 in 100 men show any credibility.
Men have wrongly assumed that women want control so their negotiation with women has largely been unsuccessful. Women want character and behavior almost universally while less than half want sole control. Women do want final say and obedience form men, they also want acknowledgement of their leadership. These would be far better negotiation trades.
As a group men continue to seek their definition for FLR which keeps women from participating. Women are relationship oriented and men tend to want those things that are anti-relationship such as consensual slavery and cuckolding. Men are actively promoting FemDom porn by participating in it making many women self conscience and angry. Even though men know they are repelling women they continue to approach FLR as a fantasy.
more to follow....
The 5 Food Groups In depth
|Women were asked|
|I like the thought of managing our life?|
|In Some Ways||No||Yes|
97% of women like the idea of managing the couples lives. Add this to the 99% of women interested in having the final decision in the couples lives and it speaks volumes about how women feel.
|Women were asked|
|I like the thought of changing him?|
|In Some Ways||No||Yes|
Women think highly of the idea of changing their men. 89% of those polled were positive about it. So another strong motive is a woman's desire to control their environment and their men.