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I have just started dating a FLR Lady. I have read that I shouldn't ask her about FLR related questions since I am being trained to be in a cross of 3 with a little 4 . My question is this. When dating am I allowed to touch or show affection to my Lady or is that considered taboo...same goes for (texting, email...etc). Or am I being taught that I can only show affection when she says or makes the first move.
Author: Spacemanbob 2012-05-04 19:48:53    [reply]
Spacemanbob When you write like this, I take it that you don't really know if she's really into FLR or not. Because if you knew that, there would have been no reason at all for beating around the bush. So I'll take it that you've found a nice strong, assertive lady (read good FLR candidate) that you're interested in. Well, my first advice to you would be to drop all thoughts about FLR for the moment, and date her just like any man would date any woman. As with all dating, concentrate on building a strong connection between the two of you. Because without that there's even no point in bringing up FLR. When you have a mutual connection, you can bring up FLR topic slowly (I won't go into details, there's loads of other stuff here on this). Also, relationship dynamics are seldom, if never set in stone from the start. They develop over time depending on what functions best. In plain English, this means, that she doesn't have to lead in all ways straight from the start (if she does, well great, but then you wouldn't be writing this). It's perfectly fine, and often better, to work out the leadership dynamics as the relation grows and matures.
Reply by: Servus Regina 2012-05-05 05:32:49    [reply]
Spacemanbob I believe FLR, like role play or any other relationship, requires a getting acquainted period for sharing. That's what level 3 supports. Jumping into 4 immediately may be stimulating fun but can cause problems. In this FLR society, you are an individual before a slave. Moderate before giving yourself to TPE. Ultimately, growth will occur in time as FLR matures and perpetuates.
Reply by: YFLR?mam 2013-05-04 01:43:47    [reply]
Oh... I guess I wrote this wrong. She is an FLR Woman and was at the beyond 4 rating. She has told me this and we are dating. First date I learned that I needed to make sure that her tea and water were full at all times and that her plate should never be empty unless she said she was done. But I am wondering if I should just date her like a normal date in the beginning, or are there rules that will be introduced to me as I make mistakes. Main thing is that she picked me and has made it clear that IF she continues and we become a couple, I will be happy as her man. Guess I will just have to ask her about dating protocol even though some FLR info tells me not to breach FLR subjects with her unless she starts talking about them.
Author: Spacemanbob 2012-05-05 06:11:05    [reply]
Spacemanbob No worries, lucky man :-) If you're this far, you should be talking, and you should be talking a lot with each other about these things. Every woman and every relationship is unique. Your lady wants her cups and plates filled at all times, I'm sure there are others who don't want anything unless they told you first. You're as every couple in its infancy, you need to establish your unique style of interacting with each others. Ask her questions, but also watch out for other cues which indicate her preferences. Show interest in learning her way of doing things. And don't be afraind to make mistakes. Beacuse you will make mistakes. When broaching FLR subjects, well she already told you, so that should make things a lot easier. Match her level... not exactly but closely. If you do that, you might still well run into stuff that she doesn't like or favour, but you decrease the likelihood greatly that it's situations with which she can't deal with.
Reply by: Servus Regina 2012-05-05 07:35:31    [reply]
For me, I am not that experienced but I think that if your heart is in the right place the woman you met may be willing to train you as to the things she wants you to do. I would serve her to the best of my abilities and ask her to train yo to serve her to her satisfaction. I think she would appreciate you asking her direction. No person is the same and no rules will apply to every situation. In one of the mag lessons it tells the student to ask for direction and critique of your performance. Again it is only my view of this piece that i am reading. I am not by any means an expert.
Author: Wannapleaser 2014-06-01 18:20:53    [reply]
I just had my first date with a woman who says she too wants a FLR. She asked me many questions about what I was looking for in a relationship before we had our first date. Being new to this lifestyle I said I was open to exploring any level of commitment she wanted because I wasn't sure where I was at this time. On the date I realized she was looking for a beyond level 4 FLR and she was under the assumption I was too. She said that's what a FLR is and that we would go slow but I should expect to become what she wants in time. She didn't seem to know about the different levels mentioned here or some of the other concepts I have read about here but I didn't question her further because it was just a first date and I didn't want to get too deep about what she felt about some things. So, we agreed to another date and she has been giving me small things to do through texts and phone calls. It seems exciting but I wonder if we are on the same page and how deep should I push her on our next date because while she is very casual about the whole thing and makes it kind of like a game I don't want to get too involved before knowing exactly what is in store for us.
Author: Bobbie 1964 2015-10-26 23:19:29    [reply]
Bobbie 1964 You might ask her to take some of the polls on this site and share results with you. It would show how she wanted the relationship to develop.
Reply by: Motleyfoool 2015-10-27 08:22:44    [reply]
That`s a good idea I will bring it up before we go out again and hopefully it will be a good starting point for a more serious conversation. I really don`t want to get too heavy because I don`t want to scare her away. I am trying to take things slow and casual and just have fun for now.
Reply by: Bobbie 1964 2015-10-29 01:21:08    

 

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