Discussing Issues in Female Led Relationships
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Since we assume you know his kinks, how do you use them to steam him up?
Admin I have never been in chastity and I have a question about it. In reviewing your web site it appears that the use of a chastity device for a man in an FLR is not an uncommon practice. It also appears that the chastity device is used to prevent him from having any unauthorized releases in order to both keep his sexual interest at a peak and to keep him focused on his wife/partner. My question is this: Men normally associate a high level of sexual excitement and desire with the state of being fully aroused. Since a man in chastity cannot get fully aroused because of the chastity constraint, is he able to feel the same level of excitement and desire during sexual activity as an unconstrained man does?
Curiousone32 The evidence is most FLR's don't use chastity but people are curious. Level 4 FLR seems to the the exception. I have tried it with little success because it is so damn uncomfortable but rumor has it that hundreds (not thousands) of men use it. Why it gets so much press is beyoud me.
Just the thought of me serving a beautiful, strong, intelligent, superior, kind but firm woman makes me both happy, fulfilled, and is a big turn-on. Orgasm denial is one of my favorite turn-ons, especially when repeated denial causes "blue-balls".
For my money the thing he likes best is my being dominant of him. That has all kinds of images associated with it, him naked, me dresses, him bowing, me standing, me asking him for sex when he won't get any. Devilish? I don't think so, but it really lights him and when he is lit I am too.
He really enjoys protocol: standard behavior, postures and positions for our typical situations. He is very pleased on being able to serve me what I need before I know I need to be served. He truly enjoys being a good boy. He also really likes being naked while I'm clothed walking about him inspecting his body or service performed.
First of all tease his mind with sexual words. This will stimulate his genitals immediately and ensure you remain in his mind all day. Surprise him with horny texts/emails, and state how horny you feel without your underwear. Describe a scene where you're under his desk or in the passenger seat of his car rubbing your soft fingers over his cock, then turn it rampant with deep sucks and make him race off to the toilet to masturbate. If he's in the car, hopefully he'll ignore your message as it an offence to use a phone at the wheel in the UK. However, if he's in the office, tease him until he's ready to burst. He'll be desperate to fulfil your pleasure. When he's at your demand, tie him up or straddle him, and set to work on his cock with soft strokes to turn him harder, then run your finger between his balls and ass to make him quake.
The hottest thing that ever happened to me was in FLR play - well experimentation. I was naked and tied up with the ropes tight against me and me facing the wall and the floor; gagged and partly blind folded. My hand and arms were behind my back and pulled up very high, my thighs tied together - it was like I was bowing but without the arms outstretched. I could not move. I could never see her but I knew she was there. She hit me very hard 10 or so times with a belt and there was nothing I could do but surrender to it - I was helpless. Of course that was not all that happened and the experience lasted a couple of hours but that moment was one like of those things that happen in our lives to change us for ever. Like an incredible sunset that you never forget, or watching the birth of a child, a life changing experience - sounds corney to compare such things but I really believe that.
There is an erotic side from my end; to submit to a women who has power over me. It is an erotic thought but not much of a reality. The times it becomes most erotic is when she makes demands on me and requires me to 'obey'. The notion of her using her sexual power or any kind of power over me, by stimulating my eyes and skin with the things I that tantalize me (her body, her words, her actions - all of with intentional tantalize and much of which already tantalized without her trying).
Just once, and it was a complete surprise to both of us, she back-handed me in the car (she was driving of course). I'd questioned her about money. I don't know if she was really angry or if she was experimenting. Either way, she hugged me, promised never to do it again (I hope she does), said she'd make it up to me and took me to bed. She was gentler than she usually is, and kept telling me how beautiful I was, she was lucky to have me, didn't I know I meant the world to her - all the bullshit things men tell women. The more she flattered me, and the harder I made her work for it, the hotter it became. She brought me to climax twice, and I don't think she came once. I know, this doesn't sound female led, but it was; she hurt my feelings, and she worked hard to win me over with flattery and sex, the way a guy would. I still dream about that moment after the slap.
D_Antoni Great example of make up sex. She did lead you into bed. It also shows how wonderful women are as leaders.
Boots: big heeled stompy boots that he can bow down and worship, lick, kiss, and adore. The big boots will show him your power as a woman and he will adore you for it.
makes him hot when I tell him ahead of time that HE will have to lick up ALL of
JackieSCToo Ick, you guys really do that. What is the thrill behind it for you as a woman?
SusanM88 It really isn't so icky, lol! I like it for a few reasons. First, I find that women (while often resistant until post intercourse has been performed on them) LOVE it once they experience it (provided that the man is good at oral in the first place). It is unique and subtle for her to have her man gently licking there after a good passionate sexual encounter, kind of like post play. Believe me, done right it is very enjoyable post intercourse. Second, it is kind of empowering for women in it's own way - a bit like the reverse of a b-job. Third, since I like to perform oral anyway, I especially like to taste the 'before and after' so to speak. Also, some women like to kiss after to get the taste from kissing me.
First, I don't allow my hubby to touch himself unless I say. I, on the other hand, can touch anytime I please and without any warning. Secondly, I find that periods of denial helps to keep his focus. Denial can be me undressed, teasing and deny orgasms, assignments with an erotic intention etc. I keep him nude. This allows for unplanned and exciting couple time. I supply him with eye candy sightings of me. Direct orders works wonders in getting and keeping his attention. For example, me requiring him to give me oral service during one of his favorite shows.