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Body Type Few Extra Pounds
A little about meI am looking for new relationships - I am currently Looking
A short bio: Just a quick note about me - I am discovering FLR after having read an ad by a man searching for someone to join in an FLR. After "Googling it" I was intrigued and actually answered the man´s ad to talk with him some more to learn about FLR´s from his perspective. He was helpful, although, I was not interested in pursuing with him since he was trying to serve two mistresses...at his mistresses request. While I am new, after learning more, I would have to say I am somewhere in the Level 3, maybe a touch in the Level 4. The most difficult thing for me is learning the "punishment" phase. As an adult who suffered physical abuse as a small child by my caretaker, I have a difficult time inflicting any sort of physical pain - aka "punishment" - on another human being. I also am not someone to humiliate another human being. Essentially, I respect all people at a very basic level...we are all the same: flesh and blood. What I am seeking, however, is someone who will devote their existence to caring for me, fulfilling my desires and enriching my life. Yes, they will be rewarded with my love, my devotion, my care and attention, but I want someone to truly put me first in their lives. Not at their own detriment, but above everything else. I have done this for men in the past, so I know what it is I am seeking, but when I did it for them, I did so with the expectation that they would do the same for me. When they didn´t, the relationship was completely one sided and I was very unhappy; which, in turn, made everyone unhappy. I just didn´t realize what I truly was seeking was that same devotion that I was exhibiting to be given to me. But without conditions as I was placing on mine. The Golden Rule was oft repeated to me that I thought it was our family motto. I always assumed that if I demonstrated by example, I would get the same in return. But I didn´t. I never understood why until I started learning about FLR´s. So, here I am. Ready to begin seeking and building a relationship as I now better understand it. When I relax: My secret to relaxing is simple - I pet my dog. Sometimes I do it while nursing a vodka martini or glass of wine, or on rare occasion a beer or hard cider. I also will sit and watch the sunset at the golf course. No, I am not a morning person so a sunrise is not relaxing to me. Unless I am at the beach (which, sadly, I haven´t been to in the past three years now), and I have the luxury of going back to bed once the sun is risen. I also can just sit for hours around a campfire or at a campsite without a fire before the sun goes down and do nothing. Well, not exactly "nothing" - I will talk with my friends, or pet my dog, or watch the sunset, or listen to an audio book. When I have the time AND the resources, I will indulge and treat myself to a 90 minute massage. But that happens once, maybe twice a year. I´d rather spend my money golfing. Hobbies I enjoy: I am a recovering workaholic, currently working as a consultant for a non-profit. I am doing my best to rediscover those things that I have enjoyed in the past (golf - which I really am enjoying and getting better at...slowly), and finding new things to enjoy (kayaking...slowly, and mostly flat water right now). I have owned motorcycles in the past, and will have another in the next couple of years, but for now my adrenaline thrills are limited to roller coasters. I have also done needlepoint in the past as a sort of meditation/relaxation, but haven´t taken it up in years. I still have all my tools, threads and unfinished kits, but not sure when I will pick that back up again. I also like to read, but did so much for my previous job I neglected to make time to read for my own pleasure. I recently discovered Audible, and have committed to listening to one book a month that is purely for my own pleasure and has no connection with work. I just finished Al Franken´s "Giant of the Senate" and Dan Harris´ "10% Happier." I saw a recent interview with Harlan Coben on CBS This Morning, and I am trying to pick one of his books (he has many!). When with friends: It was over a campfire...we just did a weekend camping trip at one of Virginia´s award winning state parks. We had ribeye steaks, roasted potatoes and vegetables, finished off with s´mores! All over a wood campfire.
Why I want FLR: I have had two marriages in the past with intelligent, dominant males. I have always known I was an alpha female, and because of societal norms, I assumed I would need more dominate alpha males to have successful relationships. My first marriage was with a physically dominant alpha male and that bored me. Sex became the only "tool" I could use to have any control over my life. Everything was about him, his needs, his dreams, his plan, etc. My second husband was intellectually dominant, but again it was all about him - his trips, his family, his needs, his hobby, his career, his house, his reputation, his business. I was to be his "trophy wife" - I was 15 years younger. Both were dissatisfying to me as I never felt I was recognized as an individual. Neither of them really cared what I did, as long as what I did made me happy and kept me from meddling in their professional lives. I believe as a natural leader and alpha female that an FLR is what I should have been seeking in the first place. A man who will be supportive of me and my decisions and will naturally follow my lead, lending loving support as I guide our lives together. The perfect FLR man: MY perfect FLR man is human and therefore imperfect. He is loving, supportive, loyal, strong, truthful and kind (yes, these go together), intelligent, quick-witted, humorous, adventurous, curious and sometimes introspective. Opposites attract, so as a dark haired, brown-eyed girl, I tend to gravitate towards the blonde hair, blue-eyed boys. How I feel about men in FLR: I have no feeling about the gender of a follower - I only feel that a follower also be confident in their own right. Followers are important in order for the leader to thrive. Without followers, there is no leader. A man can follow just as well as a female and if that is where their strength lies, then that is what they should do. A man should not pretend to be a follower. I tried to pretend to be a follower in my earlier relationships and it was self-sabotage. I am a born leader, and I have come to recognize that this is a desirable trait, as well as the role that I am most comfortable.
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