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Ask yourself that question and put yourself in her shoes. Many men approach this from a selfish perspective. When I read all the guys who want to be beaten, humiliation and torched I get the idea that love is missing from the relationship.
Author: 2011-06-23 16:44:12 [reply]
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This is a under utilized topic for men - men should become experts on this topic if they want to please and serve men. Women are human and subject to wanting different things but there are universal constants. So men answer the question "How does she want me to show my love for her?"
Author: 2014-05-26 08:29:32 [reply]
A wiseman once told me that EVERYONE has something worth listening too and when you listen enough you will get smarter. We value the ideas and opinions of our readers on the topic of "How does she want me to show my love for her - issues in flr - aboutflr.com. "True genius resides in the capacity for evaluation of uncertain, hazardous, and conflicting information." Winston Churchill (British Orator, Author and Prime Minister during World War II. 1874-1965)
Showing love is a simple matter of feeling it and sharing that feeling in the form of words, postures and deeds. Take asking what you can do for her. That signals to her that you are concerned out of love to make her more comfortable by taking a task away from her busy life.
Author: 2011-08-03 12:17:07 [reply]
H[h]er like the Goddess S[s]he is. Know as much about H[h]er as possible, listen to every word S[s]he says, and never argue with H[h]er. That's a pretty good start. - edited by staff (female, she, her and wife and not capitalized except at the beginning of a sentence, i for men is not lower case)
Author: 2011-08-24 20:36:14 [reply]
Dennis With respect to your point fo view, I find it to be a challenged practice to adopt a deity approach with FLR. I knw it gets thrown around alot in this context, but still, in reality she s a woman and that is enough. My fear is that by using the 'S' form of she and deifying her or all women, its just another form of false image worship. I would rather know the woman.
Reply by: 2011-08-24 23:25:44 [reply]
My wife and I read a book together several years ago called "The Five Love Languages". We both came to the realization that our attempt to love the other or meet the other's needs were failing because we had different languages. She needed "words of affirmations" and "quality time together". I mainly needed physical touch. Together we were both trying to love each other the way we wanted to be loved and therefore were not meeting each other’s needs or desires. Sometimes we fall back into this and I have to pay attention to what she is giving me and determine if it is what she is needing from me. Seems pretty abstract but it seems to work for us.
Author: 2011-12-14 13:24:39 [reply]
Troy44 The Five Love Languages have been huge for my partner and me as we developed our FLR. My top language is acts of service. Hers is quality time -- so I spend quality time pampering her. We both get our love cup filled and it is a win-win scenario!
Reply by: 2014-07-17 14:47:43 [reply]
I think showing love in a FLR is like showing it in
a vanilla[any] relationship. Showing her you love her is done in many ways, many of which are can be small gestures that you have taken the time to appreciate her and make here feel special. She wants to be shown that she is the most important thing in your life and that you cherish her for the person she is and will love and trust her. Make an effort to plan a romantic surprise that shows her what you feel inside for her. Don`t be afraid to tell her how you feel, this kind of intimacy will go a long way toward reassuring her that she is in a safe place emotional with regard to her investment in you. Comfort her when she is down, stay by her side emotionally and be her best friend and soul mate. - edited by staff [reason: FLR spans the spectrum from normal to alternate so not all FLR are spicy.]
Author: 2012-02-02 15:00:09 [reply]
She wants me to show my love by providing security and material well-being. By providing for her adult children and welcoming them. By welcoming her friends into our home. By noticing and paying her compliments on her looks and speech and actions. By seeking her approval for how I dress and wear my hair so she knows I want to look good for her. By pampering her when she wants it and knowing when she wants it without her telling me. By asking her how she feels, comforting her when she needs it, and letting her know how I feel when she is curious. By translating her poems into English and sharing her other intellectual interests. By letting her know exactly how I spend my time and checking she is happy. By paying attention to detail on practical things, and following through. By surprising her with small treats. By listening to her on the big things in plans for our future life, doing research to check out the options for her, making suggestions, and accepting her decision. By being a gentleman. By being playful. By letting her know how much joy I have being in her life. By supporting her to lead when she wants, and by quietly taking over that weight and shielding her from pressure when she doesn't. By surrendering to her teasing me about my desire for her when she wants, and by being strong and pro-active in the bedroom when she lets me off the leash. By showing her every day in deed as well as word that she is the most special woman in the world to me.
Author: 2012-07-30 18:14:40 [reply]
I show my love and respect for her through total obedience and total subjugation to her needs, wants and desires no matter how embarrassing or distasteful to me in erotic and non-erotic ways. Within reason, I am hers to use as it pleases her and I find my pleasure in her pleasure.
Author: 2012-10-08 16:19:25 [reply]
Cbotrader This is all about you and what you want her to do to you for your pleasure.Try looking at things from her point of view. Also, it's just illogical to talk about total obedience "within reason". It's either total or it isn't. You seem to want the thrill of total but not the practical consequences. Try for more empathy and more reality.
Reply by: 2012-10-10 02:44:13 [reply]
Cbotrader I echo Karim56 and add that subjugation only means that one person rules and has nothing to do with "total obedience", learn to look through the heart of a woman dude and you will be more successful. And learn moderation.
Reply by: 2012-10-10 10:28:14 [reply]
So often I see, "I would pamper my woman this way and that way." Very nice, but I like to remember that the R in FLR stands for Relationship. Communication is just critical to the life of any relationship. The two ways I show love for my partner are to listen to her and communicate my wants and wishes clearly and unequivocally. By listening, I mean just listening, actively listening, without asking, "What's the point?" or "What's the problem." If she wants my advise or for me to solve a problem she will till me. I get points *just for listening.* Second, she requires that I tell her up-front and matter of factly what I want from her. I introduced her to FLR and she found it exciting. I introduced her to tease and deny and she seemed to find it very exciting, but she wouldn't act on it because she didn't believe any man could *really* want it. It was a tremendous challenge for me to look her in the eye and say, "I want you to control my orgasms. I want you to tease and deny me mercilessly for extended periods of time. I know you are afraid, but I am willing to be 'auditioned' for a season to convince you that I am serious and that I can continue to be cheerful and enthusiastic about it, no matter how much fun you choose to have at my expense. I am willing to ask again any time that you perceive I am not cheerful and enthusiastic enough about it for your liking or comfort or desire." That was quite a trip. It has been very rewarding and she continues to require me to be very clear and straight forward with anything that I want from her, regardless of the food group involved.
Author: 2014-07-17 15:02:29 [reply]