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Leading is easy, the hard part is bringing those followers along. How to you lead your troops?
Author: 2010-12-10 17:47:25 [reply]
Admin Since in my personal life, I lean more to leading my example, I do lots of explaining why. Why is it important to me or to a happy home? I also as why my follower is having a problem? In a more playful mode, I am likely to ask, "Why are you choosing to disobey me?" This usually stops someone cold when a leader waits for the answer. I also believe in praise for my follower following easily.
Reply by: 2011-02-01 11:55:20 [reply]
If I were a woman, and if I were looking for advice on how to lead, I wouldn't go looking in a book tailored for women. You'll find things tailored to what you'd like to hear or what you'd like to be - like "women make good leaders because they _________." But none of that is going to be particularly useful. Here are a few things, from an old Army officer, that you might find helpful: 1) Although there are certain personality traits that are more useful in leadership, the real truth is that in most cases, leaders are made, not born. Leadership is learned, sometimes through life experiences and sometimes by design. Who says so? The United States Army says so. They are literally in the business of taking ordinary people and turning them into leaders. You can do this. 2) Being a leader is about working as hard, or harder than the people you lead. In order for them to buy-in, they need to see that you have too. It's not about being right or winning every time. It's about showing them that you're all-in and they can count on you. 3) Start small and build on past success. In order to be the confident "Level 3 or 4 woman" that you want to be and that he hopes you'll be, you need a backlog of successful experience to draw strength from. You need to give commands and receive obedience, again and again, until it becomes the norm. It may start with simple things like having him get you a glass of water. The first time you phrase that as a command and not a request, you're going to feel some butterflies in your stomach. Over time, and with good results in your memory, you'll feel perfectly normal giving orders and expecting results. 4) Don't be afraid to admit when you make a mistake. It's ok. He doesn't expect you to be perfect. 5) Have fun. If this isn't an enjoyable way to live, what are we doing it for?
Author: 2011-04-04 09:20:28 [reply]
Kinked Sound advice, books are good too but you are right leaders step up because they are leaders to start with. Starting small is a good idea. I am awarding 5 Reputation Points for this contribution Her, me She, Queen slave and such are visually unappealing and really kinds useless as they don`t really describe anything useful.
Reply by: 2011-04-04 09:51:01 [reply]
Kinked I like books because I can see through someone elses eyes
Reply by: 2011-04-05 07:52:38 [reply]
Kinked The advice given above are basically good and sound, but I would like to point out some differences, which I believe there is between leading in a relationship, and leading in the Army as above. First and foremost, a military officer is appointed by his superiors, and he will have to prove his leadership amongst subordinates who may not necessary desire him as a leader, but even resent him as well. A romantic relationship on the other hand, is a voluntary commitment between both parties, and the woman leading the man FLR style, should be the result of a mutual agreement that this is what both wants. A woman leading in an FLR therefore should expect that her husband willingly accepts her leadership, and participates actively in the realtionship dynamic. Leadership is hard work! And we men, can make leading us much easier and more pleasurable by submitting actively. By trying to anticipate her needs, by always striving to make her life easier by removing chores from her agenda, by asking when we don't know, and by following with a smile and desire. By being a fun guy to lead!
Reply by: 2012-04-07 10:04:21 [reply]
Can/should a woman assert her leadership over a man who claims to be eager to please (at least sexually) but isn't expressly seeking FLR or ignorant of FLR? Should a dominant woman be able to lead (to some extent) any man?
Author: 2012-02-26 19:54:16 [reply]
Beth0990 I believe women should be themselves, if you were born to lead then lead, no matter what you call it. FLR is just an idea the real strength is in the woman.
Reply by: 2012-03-05 21:28:26 [reply]
When Women lead, everyone wins. Men will gain by basking in the glow of their superior partners. Our societies will win when Women can utilize their unparalleled wisdom and spirituality to build a more egalitarian and prosperous world. When men sacrifice for Women and put Women first, men will gain the satisfaction that comes with being part of something bigger than themselves. A woman who has the ability to lead has a much more important responsibility to the relationship than simply being demanding or sexually aggressive. She has the responsibility to create a vision for her family, express it and support its execution. Even when she asks for my opinion, she is leading when she initiates the conversation about the decision.
Author: 2015-12-11 04:48:26 [reply]
I am in my first FLR ever. My new boyfriend is great, but he needs to have FLR be a part of the relationship to be fulfilled in it. I am reading a lot and have learned much, but I am not sure I can command him in the way he hopes for. In his words he wants a 'strict dominance' and he says it will make his heart flutter to have it. I have always been a very caring and non-violent person and am really unsure that I can do this without feeling bad. He says he is my bitch and he wants me to call him such. We have a chastity thingy that he wears and I have surprised myself at how much I do enjoy getting satisfied whenever and however I want. He says I can have a stud which at this point I don't want. I feel a bit lost as to how to be a better leader and not feel guilty for it even though it is what he wants. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you!
Author: 2013-12-27 20:21:44 [reply]
New Girl T He can be fulfilled in a normal relationship no matter what he says, he just wants the erotic stimulation and attention from you. No one needs FLR, we just choose to enjoy it as an alternative for its benefits. "He is leading you" right now as you are doing what he wants. To reverse that, you must stop, make a contract/agreement with goals and start over. If he can't live without dominance, he needs professional mental help and you need to be concerned. Get the relationship back to where you are comfortable and it is going your way.
Reply by: 2013-12-28 01:08:52 [reply]
Prickly Pear Thank you for your advice. I am feeling like he is leading me. He said he ended his last relationship because she would not add the dominance into it. I appreciate the insight! Now, I have to make a decision.
Reply by: 2013-12-28 08:30:19
This will be my first flr experience and l am scared as l have never been anything but a kind sensitive loving female. The idea of giving someone rules and to make me the leader is strange for me. And then l really want this kind of relationship where l am No.1 will be great. So am reading all l can about this and going to give it my best shot. Wish me luck!
Author: 2017-04-01 04:44:07 [reply]